Psalm 13 NIV

For the director of music. A psalm of David.

¹ How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
    How long will you hide your face from me?
² How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
    and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
    How long will my enemy triumph over me?

³ Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
    Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,
⁴ and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”
    and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

⁵ But I trust in your unfailing love;
    my heart rejoices in your salvation.
⁶ I will sing the Lord’s praise,
    for he has been good to me.

I am a sucker for Psalms; I read them every day, and I read them out loud. When I first started this journey of establishing a relationship with the Lord and learning what a relationship with him looks like, he steered me to start to read Psalms. Once I started, I could identify with so many of them. I feel that I learned how to have a relationship with the Lord and how to communicate with him by reading them.

In reading them:

• I saw David/Psalmists crying out to God, asking for help and relying on him
• Being angry with God for troubles and hurts
• Asking God to intervene
• Asking God to care for, to protect, and to comfort

I had no idea I could talk to God that way. I always thought he was this big unapproachable almighty entity that you had to tip-toe around.

Now I know that when I am feeling weary & beaten down by whatever I have going on in my life: family, work, coworkers or just our past traumas, it is so comforting to know that I can cry out to him & he will be there for me.

This past year or so I have been learning to trust in the Lord and that he has a plan for me. It has been a lot of work. I’m now at a point where I can look back and realize that the work that was needed is because of:

• My trauma growing up
  • This led to never trusting anyone other than myself
• • Not understanding why, the Lord would allow the abuse/dysfunction I went through to happen to a child.
• • Not understanding how the Lord could use the trauma & pain I have experienced for anything good.      

Some of what I have learned so far:

1. I experienced the bad so I will cry out to the Lord.  He has used the bad to strengthen me so I can full fill his purpose and plan.
2. I don’t know what that purpose is, but he has a plan, and I must trust his process.
3. It is all in his timing and he knows what I need to draw closer to him. Most of the time, it is not what I would have chosen.
4. The Lord has shown me repeatedly that I can trust him.  Once I started to trust him, and cried out to him, he really started to reveal his faithfulness.
5. My prayers and requests have been answered
6. When I pray for comfort or safety he has covered me
7. When I need help with spiritual attacks he has always been there
8. When I handed my trauma over to him, when I cried out to him and relied on him. He was always faithful to me.
9. His desire is for us to cry out and rely on him
10. He wants that relationship with us

My relationship that I have with Jesus is the best relationship I have ever had in my life. I can trust him, I can rely on him and he is faithful in his protection, comfort and love.

I’d love to hear about your relationship, post in the comments.